OhBuoyancy!

The times when I’ve had the most to post on the various blogs I’ve had are times when nothing else required much mental energy. Right now school requires most of my mental energy and a lot of my time. Lately I feel like people I know who aren’t in school don’t understand this. Yes, you work, and yes, that’s very important, but your work doesn’t have homework and papers to write. Unless you own your own business or have a very stressful job, you can hopefully relax and let go once you’re off for the day. School doesn’t work like that. It’s not a big deal, but I wish people were more understanding.

However, I’m very excited about going to see mewithoutYou tonight, hence the title.

Procrastination does some weird things to me, or has weird side-effects, I guess. Today I should be working on one of the four papers I have due, but have I? Far from it.

Today I came home, ate, washed dishes, that’s all normal. (Prepare for a really long run-on sentence) Then, I washed the sink, threw away gross stuff that didn’t belong to me, thoroughly cleaned the counters, the stove, the microwave (that I hardly use), the cabinets, the fridge, the table, the tv, the trash can, swept the floor, dusted, wondered what to do about those nasty drip pans on the stove, didn’t have any aluminum foil, googled it, decided to soak them in soap and ammonia, was going to swiffer with the wet jet, but was out of batteries because I put them in my Wii Fit, which is in Panama City, washed towels, made sweet tea, perused the interwebs, ate a not-quite-up-to-par peach, got annoyed with asmallorange.com because my site was down, searched for courses that may have opened that I could add to my summer or fall schedule, added History of Central Asia, then saw my site was back up and blogged about it all. Now I’m going to make some spaghetti.

Much bigger room with a full size bed.
Only one roommate.
My own bathroom with a tub, not just a tiny shower stall. I’ve never had a bathroom all to myself.
Ceiling fans.
We haven’t used the A/C or heat at all since I’ve been here.
Windows that open.
I’m on the top floor, which is also the second floor.
No elevators, I hate elevators.
My own secure wireless network (no special login for the internet so FON works).
Having more friends close by. Amy is less than 10 minutes away, that’s closer than when we both lived in Panama City.
Quiet.
A lot of walking – campus is huge, I need the exercise.
Parking is a beast – this is a pro because it’s my only complaint and if that’s so than I’m doing pretty good. Plus I think it’s getting better or maybe I was getting there too early.
I like being an English Lit major.
I had to choose a minor and had a hard time choosing but went with history. I’m currently taking 20th Century Russia and finding it very interesting.
Beautiful.
Winter exists!

After starting the process of going down on my medication (Prednisone) I’ve started to experience the side-effects over the past few weeks. I guess it’s more of how long I’ve been on it than how much I’m taking. Least fun: moodiness (more than usual that is). Though it may sound vain the side-effect that bothers me the most is the puffy “chipmunk” cheeks Prednisone is known for. Other people might not even notice it, but I do and it makes me really self-conscious and definitely doesn’t help with the depression. It fluctuates too it seems, one day my checks can be really puffy and the next it’s not that bad. I’m also having a hard time focusing and getting my work done among other things.

In other news:
Today’s my birthday, I don’t like birthdays. If you like me you won’t tell me happy birthday. No one here knows it’s my birthday, I’m glad. I made myself brownies. Jeremy is supposed to take me out tomorrow, maybe that will cheer me up.
Most unstructured paragraph ever.

I hate it here. Not the city, not the school so much (though it is quite unorganized), I hate living in the dorms. I having a hard time finding a job though, so getting my own apartment isn’t an option. I’m vaguely considering transferring next semester, where to though? UCF? I definitely won’t be staying in the dorms, I can’t take it.

This is the post I’ve been putting off (well, really I’ve been putting a lot of things off lately), it’s hard to talk about, and it’s not a fun topic that’s for sure. I’m sure some of you that have been following this blog are curious though and I know there are at least a few of you who really do care and I appreciate that. So while this isn’t something I feel like talking about, I’m posting it because I need your support and your prayers. And who knows, maybe one day this can serve as a story of encouragement for someone in a similar situation.

Two weeks ago, I had to have a colonoscopy and endoscopy, not something you ever want to do, especially a week before moving 7 hours away from your family for college. The doctor tells me I have Crohn’s disease. I knew they were going to find something wrong, because I’ve known something was wrong for a while, but it’s still very depressing to know that this is something I’ll have to deal with for the rest of my life and that pretty much right off the bat I’m on my own to deal with it because of leaving for school. It also makes this time of transition even more of one.

The meds I’m taking have the scariest possible side effects of anything I’ve ever taken. Thankfully, I’ve had no real problems so far and taking four horse pills with lunch and supper does get easier. Though figuring out the logistics for me, food, and meds to be in the same place at the same time can get difficult. They do seem to be helping though, so who knows, I could get lucky be blessed and be in remission for years.